Not good

Not good me bitching in this time of the year, but here I go. (it's me anyway, I have to bitch around)

So, no worries, on Jan first I'll be here, not to complain, I hope.

Well, the shit in this life is that, I'm kinda bossy and if I'm not involved in something, I back off immediately. I just can't pretend I'm nor mad, cuz I'm really mad. I hate being not involved and it seems like people don't want me around. YES, STOP LYING SAYING THAT I'M IMPORTANT, cuz no... I'm not.
I already made what I've promised, I sticked till where I promised so I'm not that mean. But I feel like I don't belong together to this team anymore. I think I'll just abandon the boat.

"One does not abandon the boat" Yes, I said it yesterday, but seems like people are throwing me out of the boat, so I feel like getting out.

Not that I'm happy about it, cuz it really hurts so much to say it, and to think about it.

The (I think) the problem is with me... I... I don't like people minding my business and when too much people start stick together and NOT SO MUCH IS DONE I just feel like giving up... So, even if it's not an easy decision, I still thinking about it. But I just give in... I don't even say give up because, as I said, I didn't give up, people made me give in.

I just don't  want to be in this not being in this... you know what I mean?? And the shit is going on and everything I hear is silence... SO... As I think I'm the problematic one, giving others a hard time, I think I should be out of the way... Yes, I think I'll be out of the way... It's better, I won't feel like a burden.

But, I know I just couldn't be OVERREACTING (take that note, this is my word) because, as I said, there are LOTS of people in it and not everybody is doing... Even one there took a place which I think others deserve... and she took it, AND SHE'S DOING NOTHING... As far as I know, cuz people actually don't tell me a thing so...

Well, I think I'm feeling better now, my blog always saves me, thank you my baby baby.

Oh, one more thing... the gift thing, I'm already out of hope, so many efforts and still nothing... STILL, calm down, maybe it can work, but... Okay, whatever.